leyton.org

Oh for the day when milk bottle tops were silver things you pressed with your thumb, presuming of course that the blue-tits hadn’t got at it first, or the cream had frozen up and pushed it off from inside. I took particular and perverse pleasure as a child at pushing the tops down almost to the point of breaking, to admire the indentation. Yes, it’s strange to me too, reading that back.

What is it with supermarkets and their ridiculous milk bottle/carton/plastic container tops these days? The ones that really do my head in are those with a really very small oval tab just on the edge of the main top. It’s far too small to get at, and invariably snaps off, requiring me to get out a knife or somesuch to pierce the top and rip the whole top off. All presuming it hasn’t snapped off on opening the screw top lid…

Some supermarkets are better than others. Morrisons, for all their excellence in making sturdy plastic bags, just can’t do a decent bottle top at all. Sainsbury’s and Asda don’t do too badly. M&S have the heavy duty half-circle piece of plastic that covers most of the plastic top. It feels sturdy, it doesn’t snap off, but sadly it’s rare we have milk from them.

Come the revolution (and it’s coming, don’t you worry), I plan to appoint a special commissioner for such matters. And not a Tsar. I should remind you that the use of the term “Tsar”, or “Csar”, will be banned within the first 100 days of my government. And we won’t be “learning lessons” from this either. Oh no. That’s “not fit for purpose”, you see. All such phrases will be banned, on pain of having to use these irritating milk bottle tops for the rest of your life. A modern day task for a modern day Sisyphus, you could say.

Via The New Humanist, (itself via The Metro) I’ve just come across this brilliantly subversive seasonal painting, called “A Glasgow Nativity Scene”. The Metro dubs it “The Chavtivity”, but should probably more appropriately called a “Nedivity scene”, given Ned is the term used for, er, Chav up here.

A bottle of Buckie, a box of cigarettes and a satellite receiver of dubious origin are the gifts from the three, er, men. Modern day humble origins indeed.

Absolute genius.

Some helpful advice for anybody who’s not quite sure how to behave when confronted with somebody who posits a rational view of the world. This one seems to be from objectiveministries.org, which has a whole suit of toe-curling characterisations to help children.

To be honest, the fewer people that try to “witness” me, the better for all concerned.

Goodness. I am sounding crotchety. Who’d have thought it?

Two laugh-out-loud moments today. Both – you might be worried to read – involving other people’s deaths. But why not judge for yourself… You can’t take everything too seriously, after all. Life’s just too short.

First, I read in the ‘In Fact’ column of May’s issue of Prospect Magazine

An estimated 7,000 Americans a year die as a result of doctors’ bad handwriting. [Harper's, April 2007]

And earlier I read about what must surely be the most popular cat in town on the BBC website. Supposedly it cuddles up to residential care residents who are close to death.

Ahhh. Nice kitty.

First comes the idea.

Then… the execution of the idea

Via WWdN.

This cartoon is rather good too X8-D

But this one in particular appeals to my take on life in a rather nice way

I’m sorry to report that a dear friend that had become an integral part of my life has very recently departed. This has left me feeling somewhat at a loss for a few days, although I seem to have found a way of coping with this most unexpected of exits. This is probably the reason I’ve not posted much in the last few days. It’s tough dealing with loss, as I’m sure every reader can relate.

You see every morning for the last couple of years this close friend has felt like, no not ‘felt like’, was an integral part of my morning routine. It really felt like we knew each other in a very intimate way. We certainly had a mutual dependency that, I like to think, made my friend feel they were instrumental in my productivity – I certainly felt I couldn’t go about my day without our brief encounters each morning.

The first signs of a serious problem only occurred one day before they departed. I put it down then to my being distracted with work pressures, but I fear they knew the severity of the situation better than I. In retrospect, it felt an altogether mournful day, despite it’s successes in other fields. So the sad reality dawned the next morning (Wednesday just passed), when they weren’t there to great me with the usual aplomb I’ve really come to expect.

In the few days since the departure, I’ve struggled to cope. I found solutions to my pangs, but it really wasn’t the same. No excited look about it when I saw it, and so much more effort that really didn’t work for me in the same way.

So today I went to look for new member of my family. All struck me in different – exiting – ways, each with their own unique appeal. However, whilst you can’t really rush a decision like this, my internet searching hadn’t revealed many candidates, so I ultimately decided that I should go for the first that jumped out as me, without breaking the bank. I made my choice, and I think it’s fair to say I await our first full encounter with some trepidation: They are big boots you are filling, but ultimately I think the relationship should be one of mutual benefit and pleasure, although I feel I need to stay current with developments, just in case.

Via Wil Wheaton I’ve got a bit of a geeky treat lined up: When Sysadmins ruled the Earth. Only had a chance to read the first couple of sections, but it’s great so far, and I’m looking forward to finishing it off over the next few days.

I do have a bit of a problem with the past-tense implied in the title…

I’m not in the slightest bit ashamed that at being a geek. It’s a badge of honour to be honest. Especially on days like today having been in hysterics looking at a few lolcat sites…

• icanhascheezburger, in particular Bring me a tricycle and haircuts time plz
• oh and mittens… and bunny and karot and elivater.
• lolcats2
• LOLtrek

Also of some amusement earlier in the week, Evil hamsters, and why-the-internet-won’t-be-0wn3d: random hex codes (More on what this is about here at /. and digg)

Some old 1979 interview tapes with Douglas Adams have been rediscovered and published, and anybody who’s ever enjoyed Doctor Who, H2G2, or any of the other products of his extraordinary imagination and comedy talent will no doubt enjoy this article.

The Radio version of Hitchhiker’s remains one of the funniest programmes ever put out by the BBC, the books are just as good, the TV version remains a classic BBC Sci-Fi effort (dodgy special effects and running about in quarries compliment the humour wonderfully), and whilst the recent film left a lot to be desired, it still had enough of the original (including plenty of references) to be an enjoyable few hours.

Reading the interview, it’s very sobering and sad to remember that he died so suddenly, and so young, with so much more to no doubt offer on the various causes he was passionate about. This ranged from conservation of the natural world (long before it became fashionable), to humourously speaking up for atheism in novel and challenging ways, and generally living life to the fullest possible extent. He certainly remains one of the real inspirations in my life.

Door-to-door knocking by mormons, jehovah witnesses, is the probably quickest way for a such organisations and groups to alienate any potential converts. This little gem from John Safran is absolutely priceless. I suspect even the odd Mormon might chuckle a bit too.